Date with God (A meditation practice)

Hey gorgeous,

Confession time. Over Valentine’s Day, I didn’t go on a romantic date with my  boyfriend, I went on a delicious date with… God.

Say what?! Yup. Ever since my silent retreat last month, I’ve been having a love affair with God. But what do I mean by God? I don’t consider God to be a big dogmatic man in the sky, I consider God to be an energy of Grace. A mysterious force that always has my back (and your back, too).

Before this silent retreat, I had a really hard time trusting God, especially sitting in silent meditation. Silence scared me. I was afraid of what I would find in my psyche without any distraction getting in the way. So I would sit for 5-11 minutes, and judge all of my meditations as bad. I could never get out of the “mud” of the obsessive thoughts and anxieties. Stillness was impossible.

It seemed as if my meditations only magnified my worries and insecurities.

This silent retreat couldn’t have come at a better time. For 8 days, I got to face those demons, and learn in my bones (without any eye contact or technology) how to sit in meditation without all the suffering! I want to share my learnings with you, so you too can go on some delicious dates with God.

This meditation practice is called Centering Prayer. This practice helps you discern thoughts and emotions as they arise before they reach the stage of attachment and compulsion (i.e. suffering).

For this practice, choose a sacred word that reminds you of the presence of God, Love, or Grace. A word that helps you trust the present moment and anything that shows up. You’ll use this word whenever you notice yourself engaging with a thought and going down its rabbit hole.

When you detach from the thoughts and emotions by returning to your sacred word, you strike at the root of your false system, your false self.

What’s the false self? An illusion, a load of habitual thinking and emotional patterns that are stored in the brain and nervous system like programs in a computer. They tend to reactivate every time a particular life circumstance pushes the appropriate button. The button might be feeling competitive or jealous. Or feeling controlling or insecure. It could be doubting yourself or doubting the world. It could be feelings of mistrust, overwhelm, anxiety… You get the picture. Any feeling or impulse that takes you out of presence.

Victim stuff, blame stuff, it’s all false! The truth of who you are is love and goodness. All else is false.

This Centering Prayer practice isn’t an elimination of thoughts, but a detachment from thoughts.

When I learned that distinction, I got so freed up. I was like, “Wait, my thoughts are okay? There’s nothing wrong with my thoughts?!” Right! Thoughts are an integral part of this meditation, you just notice them without attaching to them or reacting to them. When those difficult thoughts show up, that’s our subconscious coming up for purification and healing. These programs can’t transform and dismantle without our awareness of them. When they come to the light, that’s a good thing.

This practice is a discipline designed to reduce the obstacles to the full trust in God.Imagine that.

Here’s how it works:

Step one: Commit to sitting for 20 minutes and set your timer. Close your eyes and settle in for about 15 seconds, and then introduce your sacred word “ever so gently” into your mind. This word represents an internal movement of trust into God.

Step two: When you find yourself engaging in thoughts and going down the rabbit hole, return ever so gently to your sacred word.

You’ll eventually find yourself in moments of rest, and thoughts from the subconscious will come up. Every time these thoughts, attachments, or pain points show up, feel them, and let them go by returning to your sacred word with your whole being.

There’s no such thing as a good meditation or a bad meditation, you just allow, allow, allow.

When thoughts or feelings come up that you really don’t want to see, consider this a big hug from God inviting you to see your illusions so they can be transformed. This is a way of God bringing your shadows into the light so you they don’t have to own you anymore. You can give them up by returning to your sacred word.

My word, as you can probably guess, is Trust. When I suffer, it’s always because trust is missing. When I say the word, “trust” in my mind’s ear, that reminds my whole being to trust this moment, even the scary terrible feelings and demons that are showing up. I understand now that when those feelings and thoughts show up, it’s God chiseling at my false self, bringing these aspects of my psyche up into the light so I can let go, and transform. With this trust, I’m never alone.

Step 3: Keep going until your timer goes off. Then sit for about a minute, just resting in the space that you cultivated and gently open your eyes. Notice how the energy shifts.

20-30 minutes is essential for this. It takes about 11-15 minutes to get through the mud. I’ve discovered that meditating longer is actually easier than meditating for less time. There’s a shift that happens after getting through the superficial levels of meditation in minutes 1-11, and the thoughts begin to disappear. Then it’s just me, silence, and God. Not all the time of course, but with practice, this return to interior silence gets easier and easier.

Want to give this date with God a shot? Set your timer for 20 minutes, and just let go into this Divine Therapy. See what shows up, and just remember, there’s no such thing as a bad meditation. Just allow, and let this process take you deeper and deeper into your true self. Can’t wait to hear what opens up for you.

Love,

Chrissy

 

My Trial by Fire on a Plane

Ever since saying YES to this path of leadership and healing the world, I’ve been tested year after year to show up as a leader in the face of crisis. In these times I learned to trust myself. To trust my passion, intuition, and heart. Last month I was tested again, and this felt like the final Rite of Passage into my leadership as a woman. Where was it? On a crowded airplane that just landed, with hundreds of impatient people trying to get off the plane during the holidays.

Here’s the story.

We land in San Francisco, and everyone begins to stand up so we can exit the plane, and I hear screams in the aisle, “My husband is fainting.. Shaking.. Help!” I look up from my window seat and notice the scene. I see a mixture of chaos, fear, and hysteria surrounding a man who was falling to the ground, unconscious and shaking. I immediately shout out, “We need a doctor! Is there a Doctor on the plane?”

The man is caught before hitting the ground, and flight attendants make their way to the scene asking, “Sir, are you okay? What’s wrong?” He comes back into a bit of consciousness but isn’t there. The flight attendants continue questioning him, but something is very off. The man keeps slurring his words, and his eyes go to the back of his head.

It takes me about 10 seconds to realize that no one is helping amidst the chaos and it doesn’t seem like any doctor is on board. Everyone is either frozen in fear or hysterical.

That’s when I feel the tug from Grace telling me that it’s time to step up. Before I know it, I’m jumping over my seated neighbors sharing that I have some emergency training, and then grab the man’s hands and have him look into my eyes.

I’m calm, present, alert, and firm. His eyes are like “deer in headlights.”

I say, “Sir, you just fainted, look into my eyes and take a breath with me, good,” we breathe, eyes locked (and I sense the whole plane take a breath too). “Do you feel my hands on your hands, sir?” Nods his head. “I’m going to squeeze your hands tighter now, okay? Let me know when it’s too much.” He nods again. Then with a calm smile on my face I say on the next breath, “Good. Now look into my eyes, Sir, stay with me. What color are my eyes?” He focuses in, and says.. “Blue.. green?” “Good.” Then pointing to his shirt I say, “Tell me, what color is your shirt?” This takes him a while… but finally says, “blue.”

I keep doing this sensory work with him (with the whole plane’s eyes on me) to keep him present and connected to his body. We occasionally need to do this somatic work in our workshops when a participant remembers a particularly scary trauma from the past and goes into what we call the “trauma vortex.” The memory is so strong in the body and mind that they lose their presence completely, unable to control their sensations, feelings, thoughts, and speech. When this vortex gets stuck, it needs awareness and resources to reengage the nervous system back to presence.

I keep doing this “resourcing” work with him, bringing him back into his body over and over again. I have him sense temperatures and even textures against his skin. I repeat this process until EMTs enter the scene to help this man and wife off the plane, and the (angry and loud) passengers are finally allowed to leave the plane too.

I gather my things, take a huge resourcing breath, and head off the plane- but am stopped by every flight attendant and even the pilot himself with a hugs of gratitude for taking charge and helping this man (and the entire plane) remain calm. They had never seen anything like it before. After watching me work with this man, they’re now going to ask their supervisors for more emergency training for their entire airline.

They realized when they saw me bring this man back to presence inside of his senses in really simple ways, that he could calm down and communicate effectively. The EMTs later told me that the work I did to keep his brain “online” and his heart rate calm was incredibly beneficial.

I’m sharing this story with you today as inspiration for your own New Beginning this year. The New Beginning I received was total trust in myself on as a leader, even on a crowded airplane with hundreds of people yelling at me to get out of the way. This was a “trial by fire” experience, one that tested me to the limits but showed me that I’m ready to be certified as a COR Woman Facilitator, a rite of passage workshop I’ve been in training to facilitate for other 4 years (formerly known as Celebration of Woman).

What is it that you are being called to trust in this new year, [FIRST NAME GOES HERE]? Where is your “trial by fire?” It’s probably not as dramatic as mine on that plane, but every moment, if you really listen, we’re always asked to step into something bigger that requires trusting our deepest selves.

If you feel a nudge in your heart to step up as a leader in your own life, to claim your worth, confidence, and power as a woman once and for all, I have a new Women’s Empowerment Coaching program designed with you in mind.

I’ll reveal it in a couple of weeks, stay tuned!

Until then, thank you so much for reading my story. I hope to connect with you soon!

Love,

Chrissy

P.S. Did you see my Facebook Live this week? I called myself out for unhealthy patterns, and shared vulnerably about an addiction I’ll be facing head on while in 8 days of silent meditation next week. Check it out!

How to be an Amazing Wing Woman

Hey gorgeous,

How do you respond when your friend gets hit on more than you? Whether you’re in a relationship or single, this can be a triggering subject for many women.

That’s why this newsletter describes what it takes to be an AMAZING Wing Woman (who gets more attractive by the minute).

I was at a conference last week with 200 women entrepreneurs, and my mastermind partner is one of the sexiest, most beautiful and magnetic women on the planet. You’ve probably heard me talk about her before, her name is Lauren.

Everywhere we go, she gets hit on. Like… a lot. Men flock to her. They are literally begging to make her happy. Now, I’m an attractive woman and a whole lot of fun (if I do say so myself) and I’ve received my fair share of attention from men over the years. But when I’m with Lauren it’s over. I don’t stand a chance. Granted, I’m in a relationship and not looking to be dating right now, but I still love to flirt ;).
This past week whenever we went out to a meal, the beach, or even coffee, men would seek Lauren out and put their full attention on her and not pay any attention to me.

(Notice how I’m not writing the word “Ouch.”)

As a friend of many, many magnetic women, and someone who’s been around the block in the world of dating, I’ve discovered there to be four reactions to this scenario. Meaning, the response to a friend getting blatantly hit on in front of you.

1. There’s the awkward friend. She goes silent, gets on her phone, doesn’t interact in any way and watches the flirtation from her corner, feeling frozen and stuck. She feels insecure and shrinks, making up a story about how unlovable/unattractive she is this, and this interaction proves it.

2. The aggressive friend. She puts the guy down for hitting on her friend, and might even say, “Dude, you need to go away, we’re not interested.” This is what I call “going in for the kill.” She makes fun of his efforts, and emasculates him. She also makes her friend wrong for receiving all of the attention, and tanks the whole interaction with her aggressive energy. This scenario isn’t fun.

3. The Wing Woman gone wrong. This is the friend who claims to be a wing woman, but isn’t at all, and tries to steal the man’s attention in order to “one up” her friend. This one feels pretty yucky, and no one stands a chance to have fun.

These three scenarios don’t feel good for anyone! They bring the energy down.

Want to know how I do it?

4. I elevate. This is the kind of friend I am. I elevate the scenario, the flirtation, and the energy. I’ve been in a serious relationship for years, but when my friends get hit on, I get in there too, with encouragement, some silliness, and celebration of what’s going on in the moment.

This past week I was a total YES to these men hitting on Lauren. I approved of their desires with my energy, words and playfulness. I made sure to keep the interactions fun, and focused my attention on Lauren to feel into what she desired in the moment. I made Lauren and her suitors look GOOD, I never brought them down. If her energy kept reaching for the flirtation, I supported that!

I kept the conversations going and included myself to bring the interactions up to higher peaks of joy. That’s called elevation.

I don’t feel jealous, instead I feel excited. The secret here is including myself in the scenario.

Here’s a tip about jealousy. Another way to describe jealousy is to feel excluded, so the antidote to feeling jealous is to include yourself in the situation, rather than excluding yourself. You can use this “jealousy tip” in your relationship, with your friends, and in your business. Just keep including yourself and see where this leads you. (This subject deserves a whole Newsletter, stay tuned!)

You see, the feminine is a capital YES! She’s a YES to everything that’s happening in the moment and allows the energies around her to flow. When Lauren gets hit on (she should have a Reality TV show, you can’t make this stuff up) I celebrate her AND the brave men who beam her with attention. Together, we all have an amazing time.

But the best part?

Women get more attractive every time we choose FUN over FEAR. Believe it or not, my boyfriend of 3 years thanks me for my flirtation, and the ways in which I elevate these scenarios because I bring all of that juicy energy home to our relationship when I return.

It’s a win win.
Use your feminine power to elevate, sister, and your life will absolutely amaze you.
Love,

Chrissy

P.S. Claim your 2016 Completion Intensive with me! These are 2 Hour Skype Intensives will help you complete the year with celebration, healing, and faith. We’ll complete patterns that no longer serve you, release beliefs that bring your down, and create new empowered visions that bring your life to new heights of creativity, purpose, and radiance. 2 hours of healing for $550. We can jam on your business, your dating life/ relationship, your message, trauma from the past, your worth, your body- YOU NAME IT. I’ve seen it all. Claim your spot by signing up for a discovery session with me: https://chrissybradysmith.com/discovery-session/

I won’t be offering this type of coaching at this price point again in 2017, so reach out now if you want to claim this. Space is limited.

“WTF Am I Doing With My Life” Podcast Interview

Hey beautiful,

Have you ever asked yourself that question? I know I have, multiple times.

That’s why I was thrilled to be interviewed for the podcast, WTF Am I Doing with My Life? I felt so at home in this interview because this question was the catalyst for every major transformation in my life. It’s also the very question that brings most of my clients into my coaching practice.

The host, Kristy wanted me to share about my healing as a woman, and the continued healing I’ve provided for hundreds of women throughout the world. She already knew bits of my story because she attended one of my retreats last year, but she wanted to know more. She was willing to hear it all, from the big and painful points of my life, to the sweet and silly moments that have freed up me to believe in love again.

I’m so honored to share this interview with you. You’ll learn how I turned my pain into my purpose, the fierce power of anger when you deal with it responsibly, and how to turn a bummer into a breakthrough.

You’ll also learn how to manage your own “WTF” moment when you’re feeling stuck, because most likely you’re on the verge of a major uplevel in life that you won’t want to miss out on!

Click here to listen!

Hope you enjoy it.. Let me know what you think by responding to this email.

Love,

Chrissy

P.S. Are you dealing with your own “WTF Am I Doing With My Life” moment? Hop on the phone with me and we’ll get you back on track to loving your life and feeling fulfilled and on purpose again. There’s no need to stay stuck forever. Let’s close 2016 with that fire in your belly again. Click here to schedule your call with me to see if I’m the right coach for you.

The Cost of Being a Good Girl

Hey lovely,

On Monday I sent you a newsletter sharing all about a woman’s power and the hoops it has to go through in order to stay burning bright. I promised you a story of my own power going out when I was a little girl, so here it is.

I have one wound from my childhood that still shows up in my life today. I was three years old playing make believe in the dining room. I accidentally broke a glass candle holder while having a tea party with my imaginary friends. The glass broke all over the floor, and with tears in my eyes and the fear of getting in trouble bubbling in my snot, I brought the broken pieces to my babysitter to apologize. Without going in too much detail, I’ll tell you that her response deeply scared and traumatized me. I was eventually sent to my room for being such a bad girl.

I decided in that moment I could never, ever make a mistake again. My life depended on it. I had to be a “good girl” from that moment on.

This belief played out for a couple of decades and I avoided making mistakes at all costs. I would never be a bad girl again. I didn’t take risks in school and lived in fear most of the time when it came to my education. Instead I got really good at sports because I couldn’t get in trouble on the field.

As you can see, my true power started to fade as soon as I decided to be a good girl. I thought that in order to be powerful and good enough, that I had to be perfect, but get this.

Trying to be perfect is a defense mechanism. It’s a strategy to avoid pain.

Deciding to be a good girl was a way of protecting myself from feeling the pain that I didn’t know how to deal with when I was three years old. My nervous system and psyche were still developing, and they simply didn’t know how to handle the pain of a grown up hurting me and scaring me. Instead, I froze, and made the decision to never get close to that scenario again. I would stay far away from pain, and far away from mistakes.

I chose to be a good girl out of fear, not empowerment. This “good girl” persona was a very limited version of Chrissy. The good girl wasn’t an expression of Chrissy’s true power. I slowly but surely forgot who I really was before the fear took over.

As we all know, it’s impossible to go through life without making mistakes. I’ve had a long road with this one. Making mistakes today is still tough for me, and I still beat myself up at times with my words and energy, the same way my babysitter did with her actions.

When did I get my true power back? When I reconnected with my three year old self who was hurting and calling out for attention. She needed love, patience, and someone to hold her. Through years of coaching, trauma work, and the many intensive workshops I’ve attended, I’m happy to say that my three year old has been tended to, loved, and affirmed. I had to let her cry, kick, and scream it out. I had to give that little girl permission to defend herself and take her power back when she didn’t have the voice or courage to do so in the moment.

When I emotionally and somatically released that trauma from the past, a new confidence formed inside of myself. A new curiosity that was willing to make mistakes and learn from them. My life became brighter, more interesting, and vulnerable. I started living again and my power was remembered.

I finally woke up. I felt empowered again.

Here’s the truth about power. It never, ever goes out completely. There’s always a spark waiting for your attention. But how do we stoke that fire to a roaring flame again after so many years of hurt? We have to feel the pain with presence, love, and compassion.

If you want a formula for remembering your power, I have one. You must first build an internal sanctuary of awareness. The quiet place you return to with the breath, meditation, and embodiment. Another word for this? Presence. The ability to witness your current state physically, emotionally, and mentally without any judgment. This sanctuary can hold your pain, and from this space of presence, you can feel your pain and let those primary emotions such as sadness, anger, or fear move. This could look like quietly crying, or speaking the words your little one couldn’t say in the moment, defending against the person who hurt you. It could look like a conscious temper tantrum. The invitation is to see where this presence takes you.

Your true power is on the other side of this expressed movement. It’s on the other side of feeling your pain.

The difference between Chrissy now and Chrissy 10 years ago is that Chrissy today has a powerful sense of awareness and compassion for that little girl who simply had an accident. I’ve been able to go back in time and give that three year old girl what she needed to feel safe and secure. When she’s scared and worried that she’ll get hurt and in trouble after making a mistake, I breathe her in, and let her know that she’s safe, and that I’m driving the car now. She can relax and let go.

Thank you dear ones, for hearing my story, and holding it with so much love.

Love,

Chrissy

P.S. If this newsletter struck a chord with you and you long to do some deeper work to remember your true power, hop on the phone with me. Women leaders must dig deep in order to express their gifts in the world. Schedule your discovery call with me find out how to transform your own pain into your purpose. On the call I’ll give you a taste of what coaching with me feels like.

https://chrissybradysmith.com/discovery-session/

What “Radiance” Asks of Us

14712948_10105802128260263_564713019880822437_oI went to the ocean last night and got a message from Radiance Herself.

Radiance is an inside job.

She doesn’t require makeup, a promotion, a relationship, or a new house.

Radiance asks you to dig deep into the trenches of your pain. She asks you to face your fears head on. She invites you to dance with the waves and crashes of heartache so you can be taken by a force greater than your logical mind.

She doesn’t want you to stay safe. No, no, no.

She wants to wreck you.

Radiance asks us to desire. To desire so fiercely that you fall flat on your face. She’s asks you to risk embarrassment and rejection, heartbreak and jealousy, shame and criticism.

You see, a radiant woman has lived. She’s lost. But through it all she has loved.

Radiance reminds us that we can’t open without breaking. We can’t love without hating. We can’t be brave without fearing.

If you close your eyes and listen, you’ll hear Radiance’s invitation for you today.

Where must you go? What must you face?

When you answer Her call, please promise her something.

That you’ll be patient and gentle with yourself.

But please, for the sake of Radiance. Keep shining. Keep glowing. That’s how we see you and that’s how the world keeps spinning. We need your heat. We need your glow.

Now go, Radiant one.

Onward and upward, yes, but first, you gotta go down.

Love,
Chrissy

P.S. If you feel called to spread her Radiance, please share this message. It’s time.

The Real Definition of “Power” (It Might Surprise You!)

Hey gorgeous,

Have you ever questioned what truly POWER is?

My clients have been begging me to write a newsletter on this topic of POWER, so here I go.

A woman’s power is her unlimited source of creation. This is what you call on when you make healthy decisions, advocate for yourself, communicate effectively, and create harmony inside all scenarios despite the difficulty.

Your power is what helps you lift others up and inspire a room. Your power is what makes or breaks a bad date. It creates the space for intimacy and union. Your power leads you to forgiveness and reconciliation. Power is what you call on when you set up healthy boundaries and say NO to what no longer serves you. Your power is what generates your career, sex life, relationships, art, athletics, health, learning, and all of life combined.

Without a personal sense of power, it would be close to impossible to grow and function in the world today.

Do you have to be forceful to be powerful? No way. Your power is felt. It’s an energy. Your power evolves and has many different qualities. It can be soft, strong, vulnerable, devoted, honest, sensual, innocent, delicate, sexual, holy, shy, hilarious, and even surrendered. Your power is needed both in giving and receiving. It’s required when you’re born, and when you die.

When your power is activated in a healthy way, it can hold your whole human experience without any judgment. When your power is inflated it might overwhelm you and cause harm, and when it’s deflated, it might beat you up with criticism and depression.

Your true power is the middle path between the victim and the tyrant.

Can power be learned? Yes. But your true power? It’s remembered. It’s not something you can buy, purchase, or look for outside yourself. You were born with this power, a power unique to you.

Let me explain…

When you were just a baby you easily made eye contact with strangers and saw their beauty and wisdom in your eyes. That was your power. You also knew how to cry without any shame! Your crying was healthy and liberating, it simply told the world what you needed. Your power was present when you danced without abandon as a child, before the thought of being embarrassed ever crossed your mind.

But there’s one problem.

Life happens. We grow up and we get hurt, some more than others. Slowly but surely after every wound, hurt, and embarrassment, our power begins to fade.

Can you remember the first time your power deflated? It could have been when you made a mistake and got punished for it. When you got your first bad grade. When you felt embarrassed or ashamed for the first time over something that you did. When you weren’t invited to a birthday party and felt left out. When your little sibling was born and took mom and dad’s attention away from you. When you peed your pants and your friends laughed at you. When your parents got divorced. The death of a loved one or pet.

Maybe you experienced more serious trauma through physical, emotional, sexual, or verbal abuse as a child.

As you can see, our power has many hoops to jump through! We can’t get out alive without getting hurt.

My invitation for you this week:

Take some time to remember the first time you got hurt. What happened? What did you decide about yourself and the world after this experience? How did this hurt shape your life?

Stay tuned for my next newsletter where I share one of the deepest hurts from my childhood and how that experience shaped the course of my life. This story paints the picture a child’s power going out, but more than that, the journey of what it takes to turn your power back on.

Until then, have a GREAT week. If you have ANY questions about your own personal sense of power, please don’t hesitate to reach out by replying to this email, I love hearing from you!

Love,

Chrissy

P.S. When you claim your power once and for all, a whole new world opens up for you. I’m talking promotions, relationships, intimacy, forgiveness, proposals, time freedom and so much more. Sign up for adiscovery session with me and we’ll dive into what’s stopping you from living your most empowered life. As I mentioned last week, my coaching practice is beginning to shift from entrepreneurs to ALL women of all different lifestyles and careers, so if you want to claim one-on-one emotional support as a woman leader, now is the time to get on the phone with me. Next year my coaching focus will be on groups vs. the individual.

P.S.S. I’m offering mega discounts to the first three women to sign up! We’ll get creative together to make sure you close our 2016 with empowerment, presence, and purpose.

https://chrissybradysmith.com/discovery-session/

How to Turn a Bummer into a Breakthrough

Hey gorgeous,

Last week a door closed on me which could have bummed me out.

I was all committed to getting my work done at the library that day, and low and behold, after all the prep of getting my materials ready for my day away from home, the library was closed.

Huge bummer.

But I didn’t let that those closed doors take me out. I stayed positive and looked around for the miracle.

I turn around and my little miracle showed up in the form of a 19 month old, two legged monkey with a bottle to her face and tail swinging between her legs.

This tiny human was accompanied by her patient and loving father, and I decided to make eye contact and say, “Hello!” to these complete strangers with a huge smile on my face.

That was the best decision I made all week.

Immediately this little monkey gave me a hug and a wet kiss on the lips.

Her dad and I got to talking and slowly but surely realized that we had a lot in common.

Education, transformation, Santa Barbara, Surfing… He and my boyfriend had more in common, but his wife and I are up to similar things in the world of transformation and healing.

He gave me his card and urged me to reach out so he could introduce us to his community of surfers and families in the area.

Would I have met these two beings if the library was open? Nope.

Would I have been reminded of the innocent purity of a 19 month old toddler who hasn’t yet developed any caution or mistrust of the world if the library was open? Nope.

Would I have felt lonely, stressed, and uninspired if the library was open and I went along with business as usual? You betcha.

The closed library taught me some very important lessons:

1. Attachment. If I had been attached to getting my work done in the library and gotten super bummed as a result, I would have suffered. Instead I went with the flow and said yes to whatever opportunity the Universe had in store for me.

2. The Universe always has your best intentions at heart. The key is staying open and available for the miracle, even when your plans fall through. The highest good (for all) with always prevail if you stay with the flow.

3. Staying busy hurts the spirit. I was staying busy and productive, trying to get my work done, when there was a beautiful opportunity for connection. I would have missed this interaction completely had I gone on with “busy-ness” as usual.

4. Trust what you love and who you love. I LOVE PLAYING WITH KIDS AND BABIES. They make me so happy. I was originally thinking of doing a self care day because my brain had been out of whack all week, but something told me that the spa wouldn’t give me what I needed. This little monkey-kiddo interaction helped me remember my purpose which is to play, serve, and wildly love as a vulnerable feminine leader. I still feel her monkey lips on my face!

5. Suffering occurs when we experience ourselves as separate from source. Connecting at the heart level is the most effective way to ease this suffering, this helps us return home, to the heart of the world. Connecting with these humans big and small made my heart sing, and I remembered that I’m never, ever alone.

If you’re feeling the pull to be more productive and effective, I invite you to tune into your true desires.

I didn’t actually want to get my work done at the library that day, I just thought I was supposed to be productive. Instead, I needed some play time with a little one and to make some new friends in my neighborhood.

Thanks to that interaction I created my first Facebook Live (omg!) as soon as I got home, I received the creativity I needed to keep going in my business, and I wrote 10 pages of content for my business because I was inspired, freed up, and connected. I was reminded of the simples powers of connection and play.

And I didn’t have to do this in the library! I got just as much done in my own home, surprise surprise. It was my internal state that allowed this, not the surroundings. All I needed was a simple loving interaction with two strangers.

Never underestimate the power of a smile and “Hello!”

Love,

Chrissy

P.S. I went away this past weekend to some hot springs up north to unplug completely. Thanks to this radical self care, I reconnected to my Self and my larger purpose in way like never before. Sometimes we have to get quiet enough to hear our power. Thanks to this getaway, I’m clear that my business will be shifting FOR GOOD. This means I’m only taking on a few more private clients before I move on to a new stage of leadership in my business. If you want to claim some wild woman coaching from me and receive the emotional support you need to bring your true purpose to life, let’s chat on a discovery session. I won’t be offering this kind of coaching in 2017, so now is your last chance to work with me in this way.

https://chrissybradysmith.com/discovery-session/

How to Elevate Your Mood When You Dread the Day Ahead

Hey gorgeous,

Do you ever feel a sense of doom in the morning? Like… as soon as you wake up?

That was me this morning.

Yes, as much as I hate to admit it- I’m human too.

In this video, I reveal how I moved through the dread so I could get back in my power.

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In case you don’t have time to watch the video, here are my steps to elevate your bad mood:

1. Get out of bed. One foot in front of the other, dear.

2. Tell the truth (without needing someone to rescue you).

3. Cry it out. When we avoid our pain, not only do we forget who we are, but we live in boring stories of complaint and defenses. The transformation happens when you feel your pain and give it permission to move.

4. Find inspiration that helps you return to your source of feminine power. This could be a yoga class, a dance class, a singing class, a book… Something that will help you return to your radiance. For me I read a book called P***Y: A Reclamation, and realized that I was missing the most important ingredient in a woman’s life, PLEASURE.

5. Adorn yourself. Put on a new outfit that reflects the real, empowered, you. When you make this a pleasurable routine, notice what opens up.

Do you have tips that help you wake up in the morning in pleasurable and empowered ways? Share them with me by replying this email. I can’t wait to hear from you!

Thank you for reading and honoring my human-ness. We’re all in this together.

love,

Chrissy

P.S. Don’t let your doom keep you down. Sign for a quick discovery call with me and we will elevate your mood in 45 minutes and design a plan for you to reclaim your greatness FOR good. I’m not just working with women entrepreneurs anymore, all women of all different occupations deserve this space to come undone and transform into their power. If you’re ready for end 2016 with empowerment, presence, and purpose, I invite you to get on the phone with me for a deep dive into what’s stopping you from living the life you desire. Your happiness is right around the corner, love.

https://chrissybradysmith.com/discovery-session/

How to Be an Empath Without Losing Yourself in the Process

Hey gorgeous,

Do you consider yourself an emotionally sensitive person? Do you ever feel like a sponge, soaking up the feelings of others, whether you want to or not?

You’re not alone, sister. I get it and I’ve been there. You’re an empath. Being an empath is when you’re affected by other people’s energies, and have an innate ability to intuitively feel and perceive others. Your life is unconsciously influenced by others’ desires, thoughts, health and moods. We feel what they feel. It’s a gift, especially for the healers, teachers, and transformers, but it can also be a curse.

As an empath myself, I know the benefits and costs of this way of being. I’m one of those highly sensitive people. If I walk into a grocery store, hospital, or seminar without a sense of rootedness, I can feel overwhelmed by the many feelings around me.

As a former school teacher in an underserved school district in the Bay Area, my empathic ways made it very hard for me to stay in the field because I felt a little too much. My students lived in worlds where gang violence, drug abuse, and accumulative trauma added up week after week, and I found myself crying on my walks home from school, unsure of whose emotions I was feeling: mine or my students’? It didn’t seem appropriate for me to teach my kids to read when they struggled for safety outside of the classroom. My sweet students’ nervous systems were working overtime, constantly questioning who they could trust and whether or not they were safe.

That was A LOT for me to handle, and because I wasn’t yet trained as a somatic facilitator and life coach, (and wasn’t even aware of what an empath was) I would leave the classroom day after day energetically drained and burned out. On top of that, I was always sick with a cold. I blamed this on the normal germs in the classroom, but after really looking into this, my body was simply working overtime, feeling for me and my students.

I had no idea how to facilitate learning without losing myself in the feelings of others. I felt the fears, shame, sickness and worries FOR my students. Sure my empathy made it easy for me to know how my students were doing emotionally and helped me sensitively connect with them in really powerful ways, but I was missing a valuable tool for healing.

Detachment. There’s a huge difference between feeling FOR someone, and feeling WITH someone in empathy. When we feel for, we lose our own experience and suffer, when we feel with someone, we stay connected to our side of the court and grow in grounded power. When we feel for others we lose ourselves and sometimes violate another person’s process. When we feel with and hold the space for, as a witness, as a holder, we don’t take on their pain as our own. We have more capacity for clear seeing and clear knowing, and as a result we stay healthy, grounded, and open.

Our intuition thrives when we stay on our side of the court.

This video will explain how I coach as an empath without losing myself in the process:

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Feeling for others isn’t the way of the healer. I’ve learned this the hard way. When I was in the 4th grade, I got pretty sick. My grandmother came to live with my family shortly after my grandpa passed away, and she needed a great deal of care due to her achey body suffering from arthritis.

As a young empath, with zero understanding of my ways of feeling, I did what I knew best: I felt for her.

Without consciously knowing it, (and without any scientific proof) I felt her arthritis and took it on inside my body.  I developed a form of arthritis called spondyloarthropathy. I had to quit all of my sports (athletics were my entire life), take giant anti-inflammatory pills every morning, get blood tests every week, get my swollen knee drained from time to time, and commit to tons of physical therapy in order to get my body back. This healing process took two years.

I use caution when sharing this story because, I get it, this might sound nuts. But after all the work I’ve done over the years to better understand my psyche and spirit, this makes way too much sense. It’s no coincidence that two weeks after my grandmother moved in with me that I developed arthritis. This is the power and demise of the empath.

Then, this past spring, my dad was diagnosed with Cancer. I went home to our house to help out the week of his surgery, and low and behold, I developed an infection in my uterus and bladder. What?  My dad’s prostate had Cancer, so my body felt like it had to feel it for my dad. It took me a while to move through this one, but this was the final wake up call I needed to turn my empathic ways around.

My Dad is Cancer free now (thank God), and the most important lesson I’ve received from this journey is to let him heal on his own, in his own way. Detachment here is key.

Today I have ownership over my empath ways. This is what happens when you bring a shadow to the light. Revealing this “blind spot” and then transforming it has been so important for me as a facilitator and coach.

Today I use my empath ways for good. I can redirect the empath when she’s trying to take on the feelings for others. I have a way of noticing it, feeling it, and then redirecting it in ways that serve me and my community in more appropriate ways. I’m no longer (as) exhausted after leading retreats, I barely ever get sick, and I have more access to my intuition. I know how to distinguish which feelings are mine, and which feelings are my clients’, friends’, or even the world’s. It’s been pretty liberating. Do I still feel depressed from time to time when the world suffers? Yes!

Now I simply ask myself this question, “Is this pain mine?” If it isn’t, I say a prayer for healing, and let it go.

So with that, I want to thank you for reading my story. We might have different perspectives and beliefs, but I want to appreciate you for respecting my understanding of the empath. I’m sure my own understanding will transform and shift over time, but this is where I’m at now.

It feels right to get this newsletter out before leading my favorite retreat this weekend, Celebration of Woman. It’s an emotionally intensive weekend, an epic experience for women to get in touch with their feelings and heal traumas from the past so they can step into their full potential. It’s a HUGE weekend, and luckily this newsletter reminds me how to stay on my side of the court while simultaneously facilitating a healing experience.

Thank you so much for reading, and if anything opened up for you after reading this newsletter, please respond by replying to this email. I’d love to hear from you!

All my love,

Chrissy

P.S. Do you desire support in your own leadership as an empath? Sign up for a discovery session with me and we’ll get your empowered leadership back on track. This free session is 45 minutes long and it’s perfect way to distinguish if your empathy is hurting you or supporting you. Together we’ll get your inner Empath back on board with who you are and what you came here to do. https://chrissybradysmith.com/discovery-session/

I’m a Life Coach for Wild Women Leaders who want to change the world. Our planet is crying out for transformation that only you can create and deliver, but the first step in making a positive difference is getting clear on your message. That’s where I come in. I’ll help you find your message using your Wild Woman Wisdom, a new paradigm of leadership requiring emotional depth, innate trust, vulnerability, and a strong container where it’s safe to fall. As your coach, I’ll hold the safest space possible for you to crumble, because in the fall you realize how high you can rise.